


Broken Frame

by hayam



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Depression, F/M, Gen, Hearing Voices, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-01-02 04:00:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21155273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hayam/pseuds/hayam
Summary: Luke Skywalker; the son of Senator Amidala and famed former Air Force Pilot Anakin Skywalker, goes to an elite private school for children of politicians and lives in a neighborhood reserved for the 1 percent. A perfect picture. Until one day a friend sees the cracks.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER/CONTENT WARNING: Mentions of self-harm and suicidal thoughts. My 1st Star Wars fanfic...I accept criticism but not bullying.

Han only wanted to go to the bathroom to take a smoke but life had other plans. He failed the geometry test so hard until he needed to do something to get his mind off of it. Maybe he could ask his best friend Luke to help him out or Luke's sister, his girlfriend Leia. The twins were a year younger than him but acted pretty grown for their age, since they were kids of a Senator. Both were geniuses, rich, and goodie goodies. Han was shocked the twins would even talk to the poor, drug smuggling kid who got the scholarship.

Han went towards the back window of the bathroom, so he could open it and let the fumes out.

Yet his window was taken by a certain blond. Luke was already sleeping in the crook in the window. Han swore that boy sleeps every time he sees him, like some cat.

Han rolled his eyes.

"Luke, get up, I need to smoke."

The sad look that lingered within the boy's eyes when he opened then made Han regret waking him up.

"Hey, Luke, are you okay?"

It wasn't like Luke to skip class, now Han was thinking about it.

Luke nodded but Han didn't believe him.

"Could I have one of those?" he asked, pointing at the cigarette.

Luke was distracting, Han noticed because Luke rarely smoked. Especially not on school grounds.

"Sure, kid," Han answered warily as he handed Luke a cigarette and lighted it for him.

Han scooted in the window next to him, which wasn't hard to do since Luke was a tiny fourteen-year-old, five feet and weighing a hundred pounds soaking wet. Han had met Luke and Leia's father before, he was a large imposing man standing tall at six-two, the twins probably got their height from the petite Senator Amidala.

The brunet watched as the blond took a long drag off his cigarette.

"I don't think I could do this anymore, Han," Luke stated, his voice empty.

Han felt goosebumps crawling up his skin.

"Do what Luke?"

Luke shrugged.

"Just everything, like the world would be better off without me in it."

Han frowned. Luke was having one of those weird mood swings again. Unlike Leia, who switches to an angry mode in a blink of an eye, Luke would just randomly isolate himself, never pick up calls for days, wouldn't eat at lunch, and would just say some unnerving stuff. He just concluded Luke was just going through some emo phase.

Luke suddenly jumped back.

"Did you say something Han?"

Han shook his head, an urge to leave the bathroom coming over him. Was Luke high or something?

As Luke took another drag off his cigarette and his sleeves fell a bit and Han saw five scars on his friend's right arm.

Han grabbed Luke's arm and pulled up his sleeves.

"What the fuck Solo?"

But Han had already seen enough. Scars littered his friend's arm. Han always wondered why Luke wore long sleeves in summer and now it was revealed.

"Why are you doing this?!," he snapped, "don't you know how dangerous this is, Luke?"

Luke shook his head and tears grew large in his eyes.

Maybe Han shouldn't have yelled at his friend.

"I have to...I have to hurt myself to stop myself from hurting others."

Han took a deep breath as he took in the information. Those were some twisted words to come from a fourteen-year-old.

"A nice person like you couldn't even hurt a fly, Luke," Han stated with a nervous laugh, "what do you mean?"

Luke forced down his sleeves.

"Stop calling me that, Han," Luke growled, "I'm always the good boy, the nice one, the dutiful son you think it is some choice, it is not!"

Han was stunned into silence, he has never seen Luke this pissed off before.

"You know Leia and I cook, clean, pay the bills, buy the groceries not because we want to be good kids, it's because Dad is shellshocked by that bullshit war and mom is busy at the Capitol doing some other bullshit," Luke continued.

Han remembered joking about how quiet Mr. Skywalker was compared to the talkative Leia and Leia slapped him. Han had no idea the twins' father had PTSD.

"And you know Dad almost shot me because he thought I was fighting for the other country but I can't say anything because they might put Dad in the hospital again," Luke stated, his yelling slowly being subdued by tears, "I can't say anything because that will just add more stress on the family."

"So you cut yourself?" Han asked, still not getting Luke's logic. Maybe there was no logic behind it.

"Our family is on thin ice and if I tell Mom about Dad, she will divorce him and I might never see my father again, cutting helps release everything."

Han took off his uniform jacket and wiped away Luke's tears and put Luke's head on his shoulders. Han didn't know what to say to help Luke but if Han was in Luke's position, he would want a hug.

"You can't keep doing this to yourself Luke, you need to see a therapist or something; find other ways to cope that doesn't invoke cutting or burning."

Han knew kids like Luke in his old neighborhood, they would cut, never get help, and then on the intercom, the principal would announce the kid had taken their own lives. Luke was Han's best friend but he knew the help Luke needed was above Han's sphere of influence. Luke needed professional help.

"Don't tell Leia or my parents," Luke muttered, drifting back to sleep on his shoulder.

"I won't," he promised.

But he was telling someone.

* * *

"Time's up! Time to turn in your paper!," Mr. Kenobi explained.

Luke cursed himself as he noticed he wrote down only a paragraph. Tears crept into his eyes, he couldn't even write down a simple character analysis. He had been up all last night playing catch up with his Biology project that was due this morning and only got five hours of sleep and his brain was still mush.

_Don't cry_, he ordered himself, _he has to be strong._

He turned in the paper and as he was going to walk out, Mr. Kenobi stopped him.

"Luke you can turn in the paper tomorrow morning," he stated before adding, "sit down, I want to talk with you."

"Yes, Mr. Kenobi," Luke answered as politely as possible, he honestly just wanted sleep during lunchtime as usual.

"How are you feeling today?"

Luke smiled nervously. Did Mr. Kenobi notice that he had been using Sparknotes for his essays instead of actually reading the book?

"I'm fine, why?"

"Nothing, I have just noticed you haven't been participating in class."

Luke shrugged. He was planning on being in the Air Force like his father before him, and reading_ Romeo and Juliet_ was not going to help with any of that. It was just another class for him to do homework in.

"I'm just tired, nothing to worry about."

The older man frowned. Luke reflected on the action, was that the right answer?

"Someone told me you have been practicing self-harm and have been expressing suicidal ideation, is that true?"

And that is why Obi-Wan was acting so weird with him. Luke cursed inwardly, he knew exactly who told Mr. Kenobi; that nerf herder Han Solo. Han was a kid who went to the high school solely on scholarship and was seen as an outsider by the other snobbish students. He knew he shouldn't have shown Han his scars but Han, his best friend and his sister's on and off boyfriend, just so happened to enter the school's bathroom when Luke was adding more to his skin.

"The fucking narc," he muttered.

Funny. The school's drug dealer turned out to be the biggest tattletale of them all.

"Language, young man," Obi-Wan scolded before adding, "Han only wants to help and so do I; if you don't mind may I see your arms?"

Luke stared at the concerned grey-blue eyes of Mr. Kenobi, or Uncle Ben as he had called him when they were outside of school. Obi-Wan Kenobi was his father's best friend as they trained and fought in The Air Force together.

Could he trust him?

Almost against his will, Luke pulled up the sleeves of his right arm, revealing his wounds.

He looked down, not wanting to look at his teacher's eyes.

"Oh Luke...," Mr. Kenobi sighed.

Tears started running down Luke's eyes. Mr. Kenobi is going to most likely tell his parents. His mom and dad would no longer look at him the same and just see him for what he truly was...a failure. Not the reliable son they raised.

"Please don't tell my parents or Leia, Mr. Kenobi," Luke pleaded, "they are going to hate me."

Luke loved Leia but if Leia thought he was in any danger at all, the feisty brunette would fly to Washington D.C. to tell their mom in person. Luke had to constantly remind Leia that he was the oldest twin and can take care of himself and if she finds this out, Leia would be too worried about him and not their father.

"They are not going to hate you," Obi-Wan reassured," and Luke, if you are harming yourself and expressing suicidal thoughts, it is my job to tell."

He remembered telling Han he just wanted to close his eyes and never wake up when Han confronted him about his scars. It was a long day; his father was having a flashback of the war during the morning and Luke had decided to comfort him he had missed the bus and had to catch a ride with Coach Tano or Auntie Snips.

"I'm not going to kill myself, I was just...I was just, I don't know just tired yesterday," Luke concluded, his voice growing hoarse by his growing tears, "dad is already sick and mom has a new job; they can't handle more stress and...I can't leave Leia like that."

If it wasn't for the mere thought of Leia handling everything by herself, Luke probably would have made one of his cuts deeper and fall into the unknown. Let Mom and Dad figure out shit on their own instead of relying on their kids, something twisted within Luke whispered. Luke flinched, where did that voice come from?  
"Anakin is sick again?"

Both he and Kenobi knew what Anakin's illness was. PTSD. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from years of fighting overseas in some war the country shouldn't even be in was with. Which can cause his father to be one of the warmest people in the world to screaming at Luke to crying in a ball with Luke comforting him.

"Has Anakin harmed you?," Obi-Wan asked.

Obi-Wan knew his father's episodes way too well.

Luke shook his head.

"No, it's just..."

He wavered off as he remembered how he tried waking up his dad when his father was having one of his nightmares. Mom wasn't home yet and his dad was yelling so loud in his sleep until Luke and Leia couldn't sleep. His dad pushed him on the floor and took out his gun and pressed it against Luke's head.

"What did he do Luke?" Obi-Wan urged.

Luke then remembered his dad crying in his arms after realizing Luke was his son, not some nameless stranger in the other country's uniforms. Luke held him even though he was shaking himself.

He can't betray his dad, what kind of son would he be? He remembered fighting with Leia, one of the few times he and his twin sister fought, when Leia decided to stay over at Han's just to get away from their father. She came back of course, but Luke felt it was because of him rather than their father.

"It was just a push," Luke told Obi-Wan, refusing to dive into details, "I'm okay."

"Does Padmé know about this, Luke?"

He remembered his mom telling him to look after his father and sister when she had long political meetings at the Capitol and wouldn't be home until 1 in the morning. By the time she came home, Luke had lured his father to sleep. Luke would never tell his mom that he was the one ordering groceries for the house and cooking them while Leia cleaned, paid the bills, and bought clothes while their dad worked in the garage; the only thing that brought them peace. Their mom would quit their job so fast and they didn't want to ruin their Mom's political career.

"She is busy," he answered, sounding more bitter than intended," plus Leia and I are handling it."

Obi-Wan grazed his fingers against Luke's scarred skin.

"This is not handling it, Luke," Obi-Wan explained," and at fourteen, it is not your job to handle it."

Luke felt his silent tears morph into sobs, he usually refused to cry in front of anyone, especially in school.

_Because you are nothing but a coward_, the voice snapped within him,_ just end it when you get home_. Luke wanted to ignore the voice but the voice was quiet and sinister. And was right.

Mr. Kenobi went to his desk and took out a yellow paper and wrote down something and handed it to Luke.

"During lunch, I want you to speak with Dr. Jinn, the guidance counselor." Obi-Wan told him," he is a former adolescent psychologist and I believe he could be a helpful confidant."

"A psychologist, really?"

Luke scoffed. If those shrinks really worked, his dad wouldn't have almost killed him.

"You need help, Luke," Obi-Wan urged, "please, visit Dr. Jinn."

Mr. Kenobi handed Luke the yellow slip and Luke shoved it in his pocket. Luke muttered a thank you and stormed out into the hallway. Luckily, it was empty since everyone was at lunch or class. Luke was probably just going to take a cab home or something or call Grandma Jobal to pick him up.

_Yeah_,_ Luke go home, like anyone can help you,_ the voice whispered to him,_ Mr. Kenobi is not your friend, he is just going to fail you like everyone else including yourself. Everyone hates you and would be better off without you. Just do them all a favor and off your-_

"Shut up!" he ordered out loud.

Mr. Windu, who was patrolling the hallways turned around and gave him a confused look. Mr. Windu was the Geometry teacher and was no one's favorite teacher due to his hard grading. 

"Mr. Skywalker, who are you talking to?"

"Myself," Luke admitted.

"And where are you going since this is your lunchtime?"

Luke handed the man the yellow slip. It was either dealing with Mr. Windu calling home or seeing Mr. Jinn.

"I was just going to see Mr. Jinn for something."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *in SpongeBob voice* "One year later", hayam I finally decided to continue this story, sorry for the VERY long wait. Ya'll win the award for patience and thank you for the kudos and sweet comments! And as usual, please remember that the triggers for the story include self-harm and suicidal thoughts! Also, reference to PTSD! Now I am talking too much.

Leia hated Geometry with all her heart and passion. Thank God she inherited her father's natural aptitude for anything math-related or she would be failing right along with Han. Unlike her father and brother, who loved mathematics she enjoyed reading about history, particularly historical wars.  
  
"I can't believe Mr. Windu gave me a 20 on this quiz, I copied off of you," Han muttered.  
  
Leia rolled her eyes.  
  
"There are three different quizzes, Han," she explained.  
  
Her boyfriend was smart but devastatingly lazy. But she found way go with the flow strangely attractive, maybe because it was such a distraction from her home life.  
  
"Fuck it, quiz grades weigh just as much as the homework and I have straight A's for that," he pointed out as he shoved the paper in his backpack.  
  
"Only because Luke gives you all the answers," she retorted.  
  
Leia tried telling Luke giving Han the answers was not helpful in the long run but Luke flat out ignores her. In fact, she couldn't remember the last time she had a full conversation with Luke that didn't involve their problems. It was always "how is Dad acting today?" "Is Mom here?" "Did you get enough groceries?" "It is your turn to watch over Dad."  
  
"Hey, I do things for Luke in return," Han reminded as they entered the cafeteria line," like buying him lunch."  
  
Leia sighed, that is one thing her family has more than enough of, money. Luke should be the one buying Han lunch.  
  
"Uh-huh, see you in sixth period," she told him as he headed to lunch and she headed to her Biology with Ms. Gallia.  
  
She hated having lunch last because all her friends, had C Lunch but whatever. She would just study at the library, the only time she could have some peace and quiet without basically running the household with her brother.  
  
When she passed the guidance counselors' office, her eyes widened when she saw Luke waiting on the bench outside. He seemed to be in his own world, repeatedly snapping a rubber band against his wrist.  
  
"Hey, Luke what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be at lunch?"  
  
Luke looked up at her and sighed.  
  
"I'm seeing Miss Nunya," he told her, his face emotionless  
  
"Miss Nunya?"  
  
"Yes, Nunya business," he finished as he crossed his arms, "you have two minutes before the bell rings so run along baby sister."  
  
Leia narrowed her eyes, Luke knew she hated being called baby sister by her twin brother who was only older than her by a few minutes.  
  
She was about to leave but then she turned back.  
  
"Actually, if I go in there with you, I can't get in trouble," Leia told him while sitting down, "so what are we getting ourselves into; did you get in trouble for smoking pot with Han again, did you mouth off at Principal Yoda, did Coach Tano catch you sleeping during gym again? Does it have something to do with those bandages on your arm?-"  
  
"Shut up!" Luke snapped as his blue eyes became electric with anger.  
  
Leia smiled, so she would just pound Luke with questions until one pisses him off, a tactic that has been working with Luke since they were five years old.  
  
_So it had something to do with the bandages,_ she thought. Luke had been wearing those bandages for months and she never really thought of it. Luke did have a knack for getting into fights with people who twice his size and she would always have to jump in before he got beat up too badly.  
  
"Did Jabba do this to you?"  
  
Jabba Hutt was the biggest guy in the school, a senior who had always cat called Leia and spread rumors about sleeping with her. Leia could usually tear him apart herself when she was around but when she wasn't Han and Luke would get into it with him and his band of goons.  
  
"No," Luke stated while looking up at the ceiling.  
  
"Then how-“, she started but then the door opened, revealing a really tall older man, definitely above six feet, with long grayish-brown hair. Dr. Jinn, the school's psychologist.  
  
"I'm sorry Luke I'm late, are you ready for our session?" he asked.  
  
"Session? What's wrong, Luke?" Leia asked her brother as she tried reading her brother's face.  
  
The only people who saw Dr. Jinn that she knew of were the delinquents like Greedo or people who saw their parents die like Jyn Erso. The kids that had some serious issues.  
  
I guess handling a father with severe PTSD and a near absentee politician mother could be something serious to others, she thought. But it was her life and there was nothing she could do but accept it.  
  
"Luke, you have been telling me that you wanted to tell your family about these sessions," Dr. Jinn reminded,"maybe Leia is a start but is all up to you."  
  
Luke took a shaky sigh before saying, "Okay but it has to be in the office."  
  


* * *

  
  
Dr. Jinn's office was a cozy little space that smelt vaguely of nutmeg and cinnamon. There were couches instead of desks and a pet iguana in a cage. Leia had concluded Dr. Jinn was probably a hippie back in his younger years.  
  
"Cookies, Leia?," Mr. Jinn asked, handing pointing at a tin of fig newtons. Yuck.  
  
"No thank you, sir," she denied politely as she sat next to Luke.  
  
"Leia, the bandages...the bandages on my arm are from me cutting myself," Luke told her, his voice hesitant.  
  
The brunette felt dread pour into her bloodstream but she remained stone-faced. What was it her dad told her before his relapse? _Get straight to the root of the problem_. She couldn't get all mushy and emotional no matter how fucked up it is that her brother, who always seemed to be the calmest in the family, was actually hurting himself.  
  
"How long has this being going for Luke?" she asked, her voice stiff.  
  
"So...where should I begin," Luke stated as he squinted right eye and tilted his head ever so slightly, something that their mother did when trying to come up with what to say.  
  
"So, it all started around August, you know when Mom started her political campaign and Dad came back from overseas."  
  
Leia nodded. Their mom, Senator Padmé Amidala, had always been in the political environment since they were toddlers, starting as Governor of Maryland when they were born, then she was in the House, and then she was Senator. But she had been ultra busy running against President Palpatine, who had been slowly extending the length of his presidency by extending the war. She had been doing double duty as working as Senator and campaigning for the presidency for two months. Now she was traveling the South for her campaign.  
  
Meanwhile, their dad had a severe relapse in his PTSD, nearly killing Luke by a gunshot. If it wasn't for Luke's large pleading blue eye and their father's teary apologies, she would have called the police right there and then.  
  
"I felt myself becoming just pissed off at myself for not being able to fix it and cutting myself was the only thing that made me feel better without dying."  
  
Leia stared at Luke in silence, not sure how to respond. She was angry but at who? Her Dad for signing up to be in the Military all those years before, her Mom for trying to save the world but not her own family, Luke for thinking cutting himself was a great coping mechanism, or herself for not realizing how fucked up their situation was until Luke literally spelled it out to her that he was near suicidal.  
  
"We should have let Mom put Dad in the mental hospital," she concluded.  
  
That had to be the logical answer right? Maybe there wasn't any logic maybe it was just emotions and she honestly didn't know to deal with that. That's why she loved to debate, just logos, and ethos; little pathos.  
Luke rolled his eyes.  
  
"Really Leia?"  
  
"Yes really!," she snapped, "I mean look at you, you are butchering yourself and just said you wanted to die! I would rather lose Dad for a few months than lose my brother for life!"  
  
Leia prepared for Luke to start yelling at her back but to her surprise, he just grabbed her hand.  
  
"That is what I'm trying to avoid, Leia," he explained, "but I think this is something we should talk with Mom and Dad first."  
  
Leia sighed.  
  
"Fine, Mom is coming home this weekend, and we will need to talk about this before it gets out of hand."


End file.
